shot

It's been a while but on an honest note I don't plan on writing every day. Not that I'm not a devoted writer [which I'm not] or anything it just has to do with the fact that I'm a teenage girl and a lot of shit goes on. More than adults might remember. Last night my boyfriend and I where on the verge of breaking up. Now I know this would be something he'd be extremely pissed about me telling blogger.com but I can't necessarily talk to my friends about it and my family couldn't even inch towards understanding. Now I'm not going to bitch and moan about or fight or even say completely what it was about. But I will admit that in this particular fight and along with other fights we've partaken in I was wrong to have done what I did. Now I didn't cheat or anything like that but what I did do was take him for granted. He's honestly a top of line boyfriend, any girl my age would wet their panties if they knew about all the awesome things he does and says for me. My reason for bringing this up is because I'd like to question upon one thing.
WHY DOES LOVE GET LAZY?
now I'm not criticizing anyone because I'm the one at fault here for doing it. It's not like I love him any less. I mean he means the world to me whether you take it as puppy teenage love or something serious I take it as I never have thought of leaving him and we've been together a little more than a year. I've never wanted to even imagine seeing him go and I'll cry at the thought or even a small threat of that happening. BUT what I really want to bring to the question is why? Do people get tired of other people even when they love them the same as they did the first week they where together? Are people still infatuated with each other after years and years of being together? Is there such thing as a perfect relationship? I know people fight in fact my parents have never even been married or have been together for more than 4-5 years and they still fight while I'm 17 they still disagree with each other and they don't even live together but they still long for each others love they still wish they where together but they can't be because there's so many problems with how my dad lives his life and there's so many issues with how my mom perceives some things well anything but why couldn't they work it out? 
WHY CAN'T RELATIONSHIPS WORK OUT?
WHY ARE PEOPLE SO LAZY WITH LOVE?
I can understand how some relationships can't work out, how differences get in the way. But what about the people who still love each other but are just not willing enough to work it out? WORK IT OUT WORK IT OUT WORK IT OUT .. :) sorry. But how can the thought and heart be there but the actions can't conclude in a solution. Now I'm really friggen trying here with my boyfriend to be a more loving girlfriend, ya know? cause he really deserves it and if anything I don't deserve to even be with this kid. But in the long run we do love each other, and I'm already making some progress I just can't forget that I love him, I'll do anything for him and I'll see to being with him for years in years to come. I guess the only reason I got lazy is because I honestly thought we would just get married no matter what. But as teenagers he's not obligated to stay in this relationship (neither am I but I WANT TO BE) he's not obligated to be sweet to me or to be nice to me every day. But he does because he loves me and I fell behind on that. I need to shape up. Because when he shot me down with this realization that he could leave it was like really getting shot down with a gun with a life gun that was held by someone who with holds my heart and every little piece of knowledge that my life contains. I just hope, that I don't get lazy anymore. I don't want to be shot again.
[11.3.11]